Transitioning into management for the first time can be an overwhelming experience. New managers often feel the pressure to be perfect from the start, believing they need to solve every problem, meet every expectation, and ensure their team functions flawlessly. However, striving for perfection can quickly lead to burnout and can stunt the growth of the team. Instead, I encourage a shift in mindset: embrace being a Good Enough Manager.
This concept draws inspiration from British psychoanalyst Donald Winnicott’s theory of the Good Enough Mother. According to Winnicott, a mother (or a father in my eyes) doesn’t need to be flawless to raise a healthy child. In fact, being "good enough"—offering adequate care but allowing the child to experience manageable frustrations—helps foster independence and resilience. By not intervening in every small issue, the parent enables the child to develop problem-solving skills and emotional strength.
I tend to translate “Good Enough” quite literally, meaning that simply being yourself is good enough 😊, but there’s more to it. Similarly, a "Good Enough Manager" offers guidance and support without trying to micromanage or deliver perfect results every time. This approach not only relieves the manager of unrealistic pressures but also fosters a stronger, more self-reliant team.
Let’s dive into how this mindset plays out in practice:
1. Focus on Adequate Support, Not Perfection
New managers often feel they need to be experts in every area, but this mentality can lead to stress and inefficiency. A Good Enough Manager understands that they won’t always have all the answers—and that’s okay. Instead of trying to fix every problem or control every detail, focus on providing your team with the necessary support most of the time. Let your team learn by doing, allowing them to develop their own problem-solving skills and autonomy.
Remember- You don’t need to be perfect. Provide guidance and trust your team to work through challenges on their own, knowing that mistakes and learning are part of the process.
2. Create a Safe Environment for Learning
Just as a child needs space to explore and make mistakes, employees need room to experiment and learn from their experiences. The Good Enough Manager fosters an environment where it’s safe for employees to try new things, even if it means failing occasionally. When people aren’t paralyzed by the fear of making mistakes, they’re more likely to take risks, innovate, and find creative solutions.
Try to cultivate a work environment where taking calculated risks is encouraged and where failure is seen as a valuable learning opportunity.
3. Build Emotional Resilience in Your Team
Being a Good Enough Manager also means letting your team experience challenges and frustrations without stepping in to immediately solve every problem. Much like Winnicott’s Good Enough Mother allows her child to face difficulties to build emotional resilience, a manager who allows their team to navigate tough situations helps them become more resilient and adaptable. This not only strengthens the individuals on your team but makes the team as a whole more capable of handling future setbacks.
It takes time I know, however try to trust your team to grow through adversity. Stepping back from constantly solving problems yourself allows them to build resilience and develop critical skills.
4. Balance Autonomy with Structure
Just as the Good Enough Mother sets boundaries to keep her child safe while allowing for exploration, the Good Enough Manager balances clear expectations with freedom. Set clear goals for your team, but don’t dictate every step of the process. Giving employees the autonomy to achieve results in their own way fosters a sense of ownership and boosts their confidence.
Remember—structure is important, but so is autonomy. Give your team the space to own their tasks while keeping expectations clear. Sometimes, structure is just a safety net, and it's essential to recognize when it might be holding you or your team back.
New Manager? This is your Takeaway
Embracing the Good Enough Manager mentality doesn’t mean lowering your standards, becoming disengaged or acting as a parent. Managing is not parenthood. It means recognizing that perfection is not the goal—support, growth, and resilience are. Just as Winnicott’s Good Enough Mother allows space for her child to develop essential life skills, the Good Enough Manager allows space for their team to learn, adapt, and thrive.
By letting go of the pressure to be perfect, you can avoid burning out, build a stronger, more independent team, and create an environment where growth, creativity, and resilience can flourish. This mindset shift helps both managers and their teams succeed, not by doing everything right, but by focusing on what's most important: growth and learning.
As a first-time manager, give yourself permission to be "good enough." You don’t need to have all the answers or meet every expectation perfectly. Instead, focus on fostering a team culture where learning, resilience, and autonomy thrive.
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